by Lachezar Afrikanov

Somewhere in every session, there is a threshold. A moment when a client or learner stands at the edge of something—an insight, a release, a challenge they did not expect. As trainers, we recognize these moments. We see the hesitation, the flicker of resistance, the question in their body before it reaches their words.

And we ask ourselves: Do we hold steady, or do we encourage the step forward?

Growth does not happen in comfort. We know this. Learning, healing, transformation—all require a movement beyond what is familiar. And yet, the line between challenge and overwhelm is thin, sometimes imperceptible. We create safe spaces, but safety does not always mean ease. We encourage people to push their edges, but we cannot predict where those edges will be.

There is a responsibility in this. A weight.

A trainer shared a reflection. A participant hesitated during a session, uncertain about the depth of the process unfolding. The trainer sensed the moment, felt the tension, but trusted that the work would lead where it needed to. The participant agreed to move forward. Later, they expressed discomfort—not about the trainer’s approach, not about any ethical misstep, but about their own readiness.

The trainer followed up, held space for the processing, ensured that the participant felt supported. On a professional level, everything was done with care. But still, a question lingered.

Did I push too far? Did I misjudge the moment? Or was this discomfort simply part of their journey?

We are not responsible for someone else’s readiness, but we are responsible for how we meet it. And sometimes, we do not fully know whether we have guided or overstepped until the moment has already passed.

There is no perfect formula for walking this edge. Only sensitivity. Only presence. Only the ongoing practice of reading the silent cues, sensing the weight of a pause, knowing when to hold steady and when to offer the hand forward.

Holding the threshold means trusting that discomfort is not always a sign of harm. It means understanding that part of our work is to invite movement, even when it feels uneasy. But it also means honoring that the final step is never ours to take.

Not everything must be pushed through. Not every hesitation is a barrier. And not every moment of discomfort needs to be resolved. Sometimes, the most powerful thing we can do as trainers is to stand at the threshold with them, neither pulling nor retreating, simply holding the space until they decide where to go next.